I myself almost never write first, because I simply forget. But it's very nice when a man writes himself.
it's not always from unwillingness to communicate, I'm happy to answer
worth it, of course
It is necessary to clearly understand in what culture this girl was brought up. Her refusal to call is largely about this. Or about what stage your relationship is at. Or that you are not interesting to her, and you are given the opportunity to understand this.
It is not clear what kind of relationship we are talking about, whether it is worth talking or not, the norm or not the norm. When a person believes that he is being imposed, something is wrong with his self-esteem. You need to figure out what exactly hurts in this situation and not look for the reason in the girl. This can happen with another girl, if the situation is not worked out.
Well, I don't write to my beloved first)))) although I'm really looking forward to his "good morning". We girls have read a lot of books, seen enough of training sessions where we are taught not to impose ourselves .... But I will tell the truth, if I myself do not write for a long time, I start to go crazy ... And I write myself. Never mind, I think she has the same cockroaches. You do not impose, you take the initiative, you win. How tired of these male coaches and all sorts of nonsense about self-respect !! How many couples have broken up because of this delirium. She does not write as if she respects herself, he does not write as if she also knows his own worth. Ask yourself, do you need it? If so, write first and be happy.
Girls love attention, but do not necessarily love those who have paid attention, if before she wrote herself, it means there was interest, if she doesn’t write, then it’s absent, seeking a woman from whom there is no desire is not pleasant and ineffectual, self-esteem decreases, guilt may appear that you bother girl, girls like to cause feelings of guilt, they never admit their guilt. By ignoring and swinging a man for attention, they increase their heart rate, increase their status in society at the expense of a bunch of fans, you are not appreciated as an object of love or even friendship. There is a video on this topic. "how to find a bitch", channel "male insight".
I would like to speak about the topic "the girl does not write first, does not invite for a walk, does not offer to meet", etc. More recently, I came across a post where a guy was very condemned by such young ladies, saying that if a guy is really important for a girl, she should not be afraid of him. And the girls behind the impregnable wall are only filling their own worth, they are sweethearts and "princesses." club card of the fitness center, they believe that the whole world lies only at their feet. And, unfortunately, there are many of them. They rarely write first.
There is another option that girls simply do not need anything from a guy: no friendship, no love, no walks.
But there is a third option, which consider units: education and natural shyness. What can a girl brought up in the spirit of modesty, not accustomed to write to guys first, and even more so to offer anything, can do? That's right, sit at home alone, cry and consider yourself insignificant. Meanwhile, she was labeled as inaccessible and 40 kittens were put on the doorstep.
You will say: the time is different, you have to change. But you know, if you didn't like eating broccoli as a child, despite its benefits - what will make you change your taste in the future? Either no one, or a stressful situation (illness, for example).
And why should we change? aren't you waiting for your respectable girlfriend who will be a devoted friend or faithful wife? (who needs what from a girl). But, in the end, virtue is mixed with arrogance, and depravity is passed off as sociability. Time is like that, and I don't blame it at all. I just live and want to help people like me a little.
I can't write to the first guy, let me wish it a thousand times. Not because this slave should be the first step - I just can't do it differently. My beloved person has never been the first to recognize this; and the person with whom I wildly want to be friends will not receive an offer from me to take a walk. And they will forgive me for this, but my upbringing is such, and, forgive me, it will be very difficult for me to change. And why? Is that bad?
All claims and hopes were burnt in the fire of the rage of adolescence, when everyone began to say that we need to be more persistent. I am persistent. But with regards to human (especially, the opposite sex) feelings, I have no right to insist.
This is how I sit and wait. I believe in a miracle or something like that.
Dear ones, guys. Don't judge a girl for her shyness. Take the first step, please. There is more courage and confidence in your blood than in ours. You will definitely feel whether the girl is avoiding you or striving for you - your wonderful intuition will tell you. Be bolder, my dears. Do not put a stigma ahead of time.
You can read more useful things on the topic of psychology in my telegram channel Your personal psychologist https://t.me/modern_psycholog
The girls always have a phone in their hands. And when she says that she forgot or there was no time, it's strange. It is stupid to sit and wait for him to write. What nonsense. A man is also a man and it is unpleasant for him when only he invests. Well, you see that the guy likes you, you like the guy, write, call, invite him yourself somewhere. It's not difficult.
It doesn't mean anything at all.
I don't write first at all (well, only to the closest ones), just because I don't want to be intrusive. And if I like the guy, then I won't write the first one
Perhaps she is bogged down in stupid stereotypes - a girl should not write first, should not write something, should not write something. If you really like her, you will have to strive, and only then, getting closer, talk about it. To relieve, so to speak, of the burden imposed by the old-fashioned society.
As a girl who is of the "never write first" type, I will say that we write that way because there was a bitter experience when a person said you were obsessive, I was tired. Over time, it becomes difficult to write first, because subconsciously I am afraid to impose on a person, to waste his time.
It's stupid of course, but I have it (
I will answer as a girl who never writes first or writes so rarely that such cases can be counted on the fingers of one hand. I often think about whether to write or not and choose the second option, because I have certain corrals: I think that the person is busy, that I will distract him if I write and seem intrusive, that if he needs to, he will write himself. When people ask me why I don't write first, I explain all this to the person. I don’t know if he understands me or not, but I would like to understand that this is not because I don’t like and not interesting, but because I’m afraid of everything and ashamed :( Not all people are in contact for the sake of communication tete-ah Some people like to communicate in public and groups, leaf through the news and listen to music, and not correspond. Therefore, if a person sits online and does not write, this may also mean that he is keen on some kind of discussion. your messages or sits online and does not reply for more than an hour or two. If all this happens systematically, then most likely she does not need you.
This means that the girl's head is full of gender stereotypes based on "a man should", let him achieve me, and I'm a princess, I will sit and wait for how much he will be enough and what he is capable of for me. In most cases, this is unfortunately the case. I wouldn't say so if I didn't have such princesses among my acquaintances and girlfriends.
Lord, everything is very simple here. If a girl does not write first, then she most likely says to her friend: "I will not write first, if I want / will need it, she will write
If she is not interested in you, she will dynamite you, ignore, etc. , and believe me, by communication, you yourself will understand “is it worth it to write at all.” Therefore, the conclusion: always write! These are girls, they need that, like in a fairy tale, he sought her, and she did not give in, and then bam and he has three children and a ring on an unnamed one, preferably the last two in the reverse order. By the way, from a recent one, the friend was all the dynamism of the guy, the dynamite, and then she had nothing to do in the evening, went on a date with him and are now happy together. The girls need a fairy tale !! !
I rarely write first to my friends and acquaintances, because I'm afraid to impose. If they want, they will write. Therefore, most likely, she is afraid to impose. How can I check this? The next time you communicate with her - take a closer look at her behavior, if she writes with special interest - then you should not worry, and it is better to write first, when she gets used to it and realizes that she is not imposing on you, and you are even very glad to her .
Oddly enough, it will more and more come down to your goals, and not to its nature and features.
If you need a girl interested in you, open to communication, with a minimum of gender stereotypes, then you should spend your time differently than thinking over unobtrusive greetings every time.
If you are satisfied with the unknown of her motives, possible hostility, excessive principledness in unnecessary questions or over-shyness, then continue in the same spirit, somehow it will all end.
And for yourself personally, after reading the correspondence, think about what you could interest her. Maybe there was nothing to grow interested in your character and her passive communication - politeness and unwillingness to offend with refusal.
Doesn't mean anything, maybe she just doesn't like texting. For example, I rarely write first to anyone at all, no matter if it's a guy or my girlfriend. It's just easier for me to communicate live, in life I can calmly walk up and talk to a guy if I like him. Maybe it's easier for her to communicate face to face?
I think that's okay. I fully support the phrase about "communicative style". In addition, if you are intrusive, then the girl will let you know sooner or later. If you communicate in a lively and friendly manner, what difference does it make who writes to whom?
my boyfriend never writes to me first either :)
however, when I write to him or call him somewhere, he never dynamizes me. and in general, when we walk together, I always see his interest
As a person who doesn't like to write first, I can say that it doesn't mean anything. She may be interested in you, she just has not completely liberated herself yet. Perhaps she is suspicious and afraid of being intrusive. It is better to look at how she communicates with you: lively, fun, or just to unsubscribe; whether your conversation is easy.
By myself, I will say that a lot depends on how you talked before. I do not consider it shameful to write first, but if several times I got it at the wrong time or I was not answered, then most likely I will not continue this practice.
But in general, yes, if on your initiative the communication is active and positive, then the lack of initiative does not mean anything. It's just a girl like that.
I can say that I do not consider it shameful to be the first to strike up a conversation, especially online. And especially, if I feel sympathy for a young man, I always write first. However, judging by the reactions of girlfriends, this behavior is still rare these days.
Again, based on personal experience, I am hesitant to declare that at times it can be difficult to guess the intonation and catch the joke while reading the text.
Author, invite her on a date, meet face to face and everything will fall into place. Although, you may not meet, if you are still not interesting to her. Believe me, you have nothing to lose;)
take a longer break and see how she behaves. if she is interested in you, she will still text you or call you. * * ***** * * * * * ****
This can mean a lot and not always bad. Here are my interpretation options
1) you are not interested in her
2) she communicates with everyone like that
3) she waits until you, as a man, write first
This is purely individual and depends on the person. If you really like a girl, why not write. After all, if she is not interested in you, she will simply ignore, and you will get one the written message will not be worse! good luck😉
Not already. You have to understand that the world is changing. A girl you don't know, but you liked her purely outwardly, has zero value for you. Telling yourself about love - you are deceiving yourself, the maximum is falling in love, that is, a banal attraction. And you can feel attraction to others. Now the "model of princesses" who "endure" courtship and with a wave of their fingers send "licks" to themselves, then from themselves, is leaving. Doesn't want to communicate - there are others :)
If a girl WRITS or CALLS you first, it means that:
1) she really likes you, so to speak "above average";
2) this girl enters the number of that absolute minority of girls who believe that there is nothing prejudicial in this, that this does not humiliate her femininity, etc.
3) this girl loves certainty and always wants to plan her time, including with you .
In all other cases, Russian girls DO NOT write or call first. This is the mentality. This is a given. Just accept it and call / write yourself first.
Doesn't mean anything, that might be her communicative style. You have to understand that while you do not love yourself, no one loves you. Girls don't always love those who love themselves, but they certainly don't love those who don't love themselves. If you like a girl, why not take a chance? Write to her. What are you missing? What you don't already have? Well, okay, you’ll find out faster. If she doesn't like you, the sooner you find out about it, the better. The light did not fit like a wedge on her, believe me :)